FeeFiFoto Blog

Wordless Wednesday: Huh?

The airplane commode was too incommodious to allow me to get both of these nifty signs into the same shot.  Please forgive the fuzzy photos and allow me to narrate:

1.  Don't Drink The Water!

2.  Here's A Handy Drinking Cup!

I'm Bad -- Er -- Back

And let me just ask: Is US Airways constitutionally incapable of taking off or landing on time?

 Just asking.

And one more thing.

Ed McMahon?  Farrah Fawcett?  Michael Jackson?  Billy Mays?

Can't I leave you alone for just a few days without all hell breaking loose?  You thought I didn't know, but I get the International Herald Tribune and I know how to use it.

America, you're grounded.

I Had A Point But I Forgot It: I Think It Was That I Hate Being Forgetful

Don't forget: we're still out of town. This post originally appeared in April, 2008

I feel like I forget everything.

I'm tired of being forgetful.  It's bad enough that I forget where I put things, or where I'm supposed to be, or to bring my purse when I need to buy groceries.  Sometimes I remember what I'm supposed to be doing, write it down, enter it into my computer, and then don't believe my notation because I'm convinced I must be missing something.

Really, Dad, We Love You. Honest.: Dads Seem To Take Second Place To Moms

Happy Father's Day. We're still away but I'm reprinting this post that appeared a few weeks BEFORe Father's Day last year. Why don't football players ever shout "Hi Dad!" into the camera?

Search "Mothers Day Gift" in Technorati and, as of today, two weeks AFTER Mother's Day 2008, you'll find the phrase in nearly 20,000 blog posts with any level of authority.

Search "Fathers Day Gift" and, as of today, three weeks BEFORE Father's Day 2008, you'll find the phrase in just short of 10,000 blog posts.

**As an interesting side note, if you check these same terms in Technorati this year, the number of posts is about half of the total of a year ago.

No Time Mom lists all of three contests or giveaways for Father's Day.

Open Your Wallet And Give

We're on vacation for a couple of weeks and internet will be intermittent, so I'm offering up some older posts I hope you'll enjoy.  This one's from November, 2007.

See this man?  His name is Catalino Tapia.  He's a 63-year-old gardener.  He lives in Redwood City, CA and works maintaining trees and gardens in San Francisco.

He's also a philanthropist.  Read about him here:

"Catalino Tapia [came] from Mexico ... 40 years ago with a sixth-grade education and only $6 ... He became a legal resident and raised a family by working in a donut shop, a machine shop and then plant nurseries, before starting his own gardening business...

Tapia ... always had his eyes on the future…Even before his first child was born ... he was saving money for them to go to school.

Tapia's youngest son attended UCLA and then ... the University of California - Berkeley Law School. He's now a lawyer in Los Angeles...

Tapia wanted to do something to help the less-fortunate children in his community ... His son suggested Tapia start a foundation that would give scholarships to students ...

Rules To Remember For Shopping Online

Still on vacation. This one came after the Christmas season, but it's relevant any time of year.

Ways to make online shopping less stressful

In case you've blocked it from your memory, we just emerged from a heavy shopping season (Christmas, remember?) and as a relatively new retailer I noticed patterns in some of the ways customers get themselves into trouble.  Here is a list of things to remember to make your online shopping experience more satisfying.

1.    Consider shipping parameters.  This is a big one, especially when you get close to your deadline.  If you absolutely positively must have it before Christmas, or Valentine's Day, or Mother's Day, or a birthday, don't put blind faith in any LMNOP shipper because even though they won't admit it, they're all at the mercy of weather, traffic and any number of other possible interferences.  If there's any question in your mind about whether your package will show up on time, opt for expedited shipping.

2.    Check rules for returns.  Internet shopping is incredibly convenient, but there's not always as much leeway as you might think.  If you're buying from a small seller or on eBay, chances are your ability to return your purchase will be limited.  If you're buying something pseudo-perishable like electronics or seasonal items, you may be subject to restocking fees or strict time limitations.  I bought my brother-in-law a camera from 42nd Street Photo, a huge company, and ended up unable to exchange it because their time limit had passed by the time I'd given it to him.

Vacation Homework

We're leaving for a couple of weeks and internet will be intermittent, so I'm offering up some older posts I hope you'll enjoy.  This one's from November, 2007.

I’d like to welcome today’s guest poster.  He’s a retired executive who spends much of his days taking and teaching literature classes, playing chess with friends and grandchildren, and helping his daughter renovate a seriously intractable website.  Allow me to introduce: Dad.

::::raucous applause and wolf whistles:::: Thank you.  Thank you very much.

Two days of hard work finally paid off as I browsed through memories of our 2007 Mediterranean Cruise. After purging nearly 200 duplications (darn that crazy computer) I had 300 images to rotate, categorize and admire. What a pleasure it is to share great art, scenery, architecture and experiences with children and grandchildren.  It’s one thing to see these sights through my own eyes, and something profound and completely different seeing them through the eyes of five kids ranging in age from 7 to 17.  And what an unexpected surprise: 10 people traveling together, eating together, touring together, and no fistfights serious enough to warrant summoning local authorities.

Manners Versus Mushrooms: What To Do When A Kind Hearted Human Being Offers You Something That Makes You Cringe

The cough.  The COUGH.  It's getting better but it simply won't go away, and I'm beginning to alarm perfect strangers.  It's worst by the end of the day, what with all the talking and umpiring of baseball games and Marine chanting I've been doing (I don't know but I've been told!! / I don't know but I've been told!! / I thought this was just a cold!! / I thought this was just a cold!!) but try as I might, I just can't seem to stop hollering cooing gently at my kids, and I pay for it by nightfall. 

Tonight the kids and I dined at a Chinese restaurant with my parents.  The coughing, which had been minimal most of the day, escalated rapidly, and by the time our food was delivered I was hacking and choking like a first time smoker.  After delivering our five different varieties of stir-fried chicken (we're an imaginative bunch), the waitress returned with a glass full of lukewarm brown liquid -- some type of powerful Chinese tea ("Tea.  It's only tea.  Nothing else -- just Chinese tea") that she swore would cure anything from a monstrous cough to a severed finger to homesickness.

I examined it.  I swirled the glass and sniffed the contents; it smelled earthy but not unduly alarming.  I sipped it: earthy but not unduly alarming.  I shrugged and drank.

At this point I must commend my mother for her reaction to this scene.  She didn't blink, or flinch, or protest my sampling this possibly lethal potion; rather, she maintained a gracious and grateful smile.  My conclusion is that she's either become considerably more laid back in recent years, or I'm not on her familial alarm radar because I'm not a grandchild. 

I prefer to believe she's mellowing.

Once I'd made my way through about two thirds of the glass's contents, still coughing copiously, the waitress came back with a quart container of tea for me to take home, promising she'd make me more if I needed it.  I asked again if it was really just tea and she smiled broadly and declared: "Yes, just tea.  It's a mushroom tea -- very beneficial.  Make your cough go away."

Mushroom.  Tea.

Mushrooms.

I don't like mushrooms. I'm afraid of mushrooms. They're squishy.  They're slippery.  They grow underground, but they're not yummy potatoes.

They're creepy and they're kooky... mysterious and spooky... they're altogether ooky...

I've never willingly or knowingly consumed a mushroom in any form.  In restaurants I always (politely) insist that mushrooms be withheld from my meal, with an implied threat that I might run screaming from the room if I find one.

But.  Turning my nose up at the mushroom tea would have been as hurtful as refusing to enjoy the Mother's Day breakfast in bed mushy omelet, and for the same reason: I'm constitutionally unable to deny the hopeful puppy expression that comes with that type of offering.

So I guzzled the tea, thanked the waitress profusely, and toted home my container of mushroom tea.  It's sitting on the kitchen counter right now.  Looking at me.  Daring me.

Eek.

Don't Know What I've Done To Deserve This

I've been highlighted by FishHawk.  Must be  slow news day ;).  Seriously, thanks FH.

Oh, and by the way -- as long as I'm here, Happy 3d Birthday Miss Puppy.  We're glad you're part of our family.

Farewell, Entrecard

For a year Entrecard did really well for me.  I found an armload of blogs I like reading and I'm still reading them. So thanks, Entrecard, for that.

Watching Baseball

Robespierre (watching a baseball game):  "Aw.  Carpenter was throwing a perfect game and now it's ruined."

Me:  "What a shame.  What's the inning?"

Robespierre:  "Second."

Me:  "..."

Robespierre Has A Job

Robey's school provides each student with a laptop to use through the academic year.  Every year the teachers and administrators get new laptops, and theirs from the previous year are passed on to the seniors, who pass theirs on to the juniors, all the way down to the sixth graders, whose laptops are held together with duct tape and bungee cords.

During the summer break the IT people (yes, the school has its own IT staff, but these days most schools probably do) run diagnostics on each laptop and load new software.  What with new computers coming in and old ones going out, 900 laptops will need to be assessed and prepared by the end of the summer.  The school offers internships, some paid but mostly volunteer, to any students who care to participate, and Robey applied.  Since his position is volunteer, he can come and go as he likes.  He'll be there every day this week, then we leave for a trip, and after we return he'll work another two weeks until leaving for a month of camp.

I'm proud of him for his motivation and willingness to work.  In addition to the experience and goodwill he'll accumulate, he'll have a tidy resume decoration, which never hurts.

No humor or witty conclusion today -- just pride for my guy.

Except: I forgot the meaning of "IT" and had to look it up.

I May Not Be The Soccer Mom, But I'm Okay With Being The Running Mom

Or, to put it more precisely, the Mom of a Runner.

Last year I described my deplorable lack of enthusiasm at watching my kids participate in sporting events.  You can't really blame me.  I was never a star at anything that could remotely be described as a sport, unless you count 1970s-sitcom-theme-song-memorization, in which I would have been a medal winner.  I'll never forget one gym class when I was in seventh grade, on a day when we had a substitute teacher.  We did whatever activity we were doing at the time and at the end of the class the teacher gathered everyone into a circle, pointed at me and commanded: "You.  Do what you were doing before."  So I did whatever it was, and then she turned to the class and warned: "Did everyone see what she just did?  Don't anybody do that."  Consequently, although this was by no means the only incident (merely the most memorable and insulting), I hate exercise, and will do it only under the most perfect of circumstances.

I Can't Stop: This Cough Is Making Me Crazy

• I've had this (cough cough) cough for more than a week (cough).  I think it's the result of allergies because otherwise I feel fine (coughcough). 
• It gets worse by the (C.O.U.G.H.), by the end of the day, especially (kaff kaff) if I've done too much talking. 
• It's been difficult (kawfkawfkawf) to get to sleep because I can't stop COUGH COUGH COUGHING. 
• I've been suspended from my weekly volunteer job helping my friend care for her delectable (cough) babies.  I tried to disguise my voice on the phone (coff coff) but she caught on and took away my cuddling privileges. 
• My kids think I'm about to keel over whenever I begin hacking (hack hack HACK). 
• Nothing makes it go away -- not drinking water or sucking hard candies or eating ice cream, but I keep trying -- especially the ice cream. 
• My head hurts. 
• I can't sneak up on anyone.

Can anyone help me get rid of this horrible coughin' ?

Got the picture here.

Wordless Wednesday: Why Are So Many People Searching For Oompa Loompas?

And why are they finding me?

 

We Didn't Get The Memo: Vacation Is Supposed to Include Relaxation

Vacation: a period of suspension of work, study, or other activity, usually used for rest, recreation, or travel; recess or holiday.

    Dictionary.com

Here's how we spent Monday, the first full day off school for the summer:

• Drop the pups off at day care for a bath, fluff and nail trim.
• Dentist appointment for the kids.  Cupcake's allowed to eat again at 10:15, so she holds my cell phone and announces the passing of each minute and second until precisely then.
• Bank deposit: boring
• Bed, Bath, Kitchen, Back-to-School and Plastic-Stuff-by-the-Register Store: Blankets for Cupcake to take to camp
• Military Surplus Store: We buy everything you could imagine might be useful or lustworthy for a nine-year-old and a 12-year-old to bring to a month of summer camp, including sleeping bag thingies, hiking socks, folding chair thingies, backpacks, wetpacks, and even freeze dried ice cream, because everyone has to try it once even though it reminds one of chewing Styrofoam.  We gingerly give a wide berth to guns; enormous and toothy knives; dead animal innards-taker-outers; and various devices intended to help you relieve yourself and then hide the evidence in the wilderness.  Robespierre insists he needs a backpack with a built in drinking pouch, so he won't strain himself by turning around to grab a water bottle while hiking or canoeing.

Image here