Image here.
In case you're confused, there's really no connection between Bastille Day and updating my About page. I'm just messin' witcha.
I have, however, updated my About page, and here are some highlights:
I'm a recovering attorney with two kids, two dogs, a gift site called FeeFiFoto (duh), and very little free time on my hands.
- I'm really good at parallel parking. Someone gave me a lesson when I got my first car and I've never forgotten how. I could park a school bus if I had to. As long as the bus had an automatic transmission.
- I did fail parallel parking on the driver's test, however. Both times. But I can do it now, I swear. I even give lessons.
- I do know how to drive a standard transmission, just not one on a bus.
- Do they even make school buses with standard transmissions any more? It's been a very long time since I've ridden a school bus. Since I get motion sickness even at the mention of a bus, I don't think I'm going to be finding out about the transmissions on school buses any time soon.
Something something spoons...
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Something something blah blah weather...
I can complete the New York Times crossword puzzle, in ink, any day of the week.
I'm a Beatlemaniac.
I'm a serious chocoholic. Ask about the chocolate stories sometime.
Blabber about hobbies...
...
I've never smoked a cigarette or taken drugs. If you need someone who can honestly say that to your kids, call me.
I'm definitely a Disney and not a Warner Brothers.
Boring information about my family...
I hated practicing law. I spent most of my tenure slinking around the office clinging to a wall, wearing beige to fade into the paint, staring at my feet in the hope of never making eye contact with anyone, especially my manic-depressive bipolar secretary, who might yell at me or demand I practice law, for which I clearly was not qualified.
I have math phobia, although unleash me in a roomful of typos and grammatical errors and I'm happy as a hog in a mud puddle. I might even correct the typos in your comments if you're really nice. I can't wait until my kids are old enough to handle the family's finances.
Exercise? Excuse me while I hide...
What my dog ate...
Will somebody please clean up this mess?!...
I have beautiful blue eyes that turn greenish when I wear green, purplish when I wear purple, and turquoiseish when I wear turquoise.
Sports...
I've been within spitting distance of the following celebrities; although I'm too polite to have spit at any of them there are some at whom I might have liked to spit: Ronald Reagan, Bill Clinton, Jimmy Carter, Eva Gabor*, Larry Hagman, Prince Philip, Shirley Jones*, Nelson Mandela, Neil Diamond, Oprah Winfrey, Joe Namath, Hugh Grant, Teri Garr, Joan Rivers, Lou Brock, August Busch II*, Itzhak Perlman* (key: "*" indicates handshake or conversation).
More junk about my family...
I can see Russia from my house.
Why are you still here? Get out of here and go update your own About page. Scoot!
