FeeFiFoto Blog

Drab Color Selections For Spring 2011 Fashions

 Adobe,  Alloy,  Ash, Bone,  Dune,   Cappuccino, Caramel, Cement, Chalk, Champagne,  Cloudburst, Cotton Seed, Gesso, Harvest Oat, Hemp, Khaki, Mushroom, Nude, Nutmeg, Oatmeal, Pumice, Sand, Sesame, String, Stone, Taupe.

1. Thanks, Nordstrom* catalog, for a truly depressing Spring 2011 color palette.
2. "String?"  Seriously?  There's a color called "String?"  And "Gesso?"  I don't even know what that is.
3. I don't care what you call it -- it's all still beige and I'm not having it!

*Spellcheck offered Sandstorm, Windstorm, Snowstorm and Barnstorm, but oddly, no Brainstorm

 

False Alarm, But Complimentary Nevertheless

We live in a rather unusual house.  It's set backwards on the lot into the side of a hill, so what you might see from the street if you could actually see through the trees would be the official back of the house.  To get to the front door you have to come to the top of the driveway and walk around to what would normally be classified as the back of the house.  Few visitors actually make it to our "front" door since they have so many doorish* choices on the way; not long after I moved in the gas company shut off my service for a weekend because nobody answered when they knocked on the door. 

To the garage. 

Because that was the first door they encountered. 

So I had to put up several signs like this:

Our house is odd.  But...

Vaulted ceilings.  Rough-finished cedar paneling, pickled to a frosty pinkish color.  A wall of shelves in the downstairs office for displaying my pottery.  Two fireplaces.  Natural lighting to spare thanks to 360^o fenestration (it means windows.  We're always learning here, aren't we?).  Friendly neighbors.  A steep driveway, ideal for sledding.

The house suits me.  We're both peculiar creative.

I added this:

See the pretend-wheel feet?  They're real wheels but they don't work like wheels because the cabinet is connected to the wall.

And this:

We renovated a guest bedroom downstairs for Robey.  The dropped ceiling is accessible above the denim streamers, making the room seem unlike part of a basement.  Like the shelf on the left?  It's the ladder from his original bunk beds.

And this:

I waited to redo a room for Cupcake until she had safely outgrown pink.

And this:

What used to be a baby's room is now a library.

And this:

Originally a dusty screened porch off the kitchen.  Later, a playroom off the kitchen, accessible via dutch door to prevent toddler escapage*.  Now a hearth room, still off the kitchen.

The house had been on the market for two years before I bought it; I couldn't imagine I'd ever be able to trick someone into taking it off my hands sell it.  I knew most normal people wouldn't consider purchasing a house so odd that you can't accurately describe what direction it faces. 

And then a real estate agent called to ask if I'd be interested in selling to a client who liked unusual homes and was interested in ours.

How can you pass up a chance like that?  I told her to offer me more than a million dollars and I'd consider moving.

Almost immediately I began to regret having answered the phone.

I spent a week polishing things and putting things away and dusting things and vacuuming things and sweeping things and raking things and wiping things.  I even convinced Cupcake to clean her room (Robey's room is nearly always spotless).  The house looked great: neat, tidy, uncluttered, open and welcoming.  The better it looked the sorrier I was at the thought of having to give it up in the middle of what I consider to be an extremely long-term project: the incremental transformation of Odd House into Our House.  I admired our pretend wheels, our denim strips, our reading nooks, the dormant dogwood twig Cupcake planted in the yard last year that I fed and watered every day while she was away at camp; and I secretly swore that, even if I were to sell the house, the contract would require the buyers to promise they'd never do anything to it.  Ever.

I don't think I'd recognized how much I like our house until I thought we might have to take the money and run.

And?

They didn't offer us a million dollars.  They didn't offer us fifty cents.  They didn't offer us anything.  They bought another house without even touring ours.

Whew.

*Okay Spellcheck, I know they're not real words, but they should be.

Today's Holiday Is...

National Chocolate Mint Day.

Chocolate.  Mint.  Two of the most divine flavors combined to form one uberflavor*.

Peppermint Patties.

M&Ms.

And Cupcake's impossibly delicious Thin Mint Brownies.

I'm hungry.

*Spellcheck offered flavorless.  Uh uh.

Things I Don't

1. I don't follow reality television unless you count sporting events.
2. I don't know anything (hardly) about Twilight, although I did immediately recognize Robert Pattinson as Cedric Diggory, which shows where my loyalties reside.
3. I don't eat white chocolate because it's fake and eating it would imply disloyalty to the chocolate gods.
4. I don't watch movies in the dark except at movie theaters.
5. I don't pay for good grades, although I expect them.
6. I don't go to bed without flossing my teeth.
7. I don't let my daughter do pushups* in gym class because of the risk of nosebleeds.
8. I don't gamble.  If I'm going to be dumping a few hundred dollars I want to walk away with a really nice pair of shoes.
9. I don't eat fast food.
10. I don't read anything written by Stephen King.
11. I don't idolize Oprah.  Or any of her minions.
12. I don't (usually) kill spiders in the house if I can manage to get them back outside.
13. I don't sneeze quietly.  Or in a ladylike manner.  You should hear me sneeze when I'm alone in the car.
14. I don't acknowledge the existence of USA Today.
15. I don't wear tee shirts with words or pictures on them for anything other than sleeping, exercising or working in the yard.
16. I don't want any type of reptile or amphibian as a pet.
17. I don't play cards.
18. I don't navigate hotels rooms or locker rooms without shoes.
19. I don't play video games.
20. I don't trust Spellcheck.
21. I don't curl my eyelashes.
22. I don't wear anything sleeveless in the winter.
23. I don't wear anything strapless, ever.
24. I don't follow recipes religiously.
25. I don't scrapbook.
26. I don't care how talented he is; I still don't trust Michael Vick.
27. I don't subscribe to partial RSS feeds.
28. I don't fold down the pages of books to mark my place.
29. I don't touch type although I do type very quickly.  And forcefully, I might add.  My B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, O, M, N, R, S, and T keys are so worn that I can't see the letters that used to be printed on them.  Good thing I know where they are since I'm such a skilled touch-typist.  Uh oh.
30. I don't wear yellow.  Or beige.  Or orange.

*Spell Check asked for pushpins or pinups.

 

Wordless-ish Wednesday

Like this?  I made it.  Took me TWO. YEARS.

Hey, don't look so gobsmacked*.  I can make stuff.

I started it and then put it down to work on Robey's tallis.  Then I ripped apart the tallis and knitted it again because the first attempt had turned out curly.

Then I returned to the sweater and had to start all over because I'd forgotten where I was and my gauge was off.  Then I had to rip apart the back piece because I'd neglected to mark where the sleeves should be attached.

Now I just have to wait for some cold weather.

*Honestly, Spell Check?  You have no problem with the word gobsmacked?

Independence Day Is Just The Beginning: Bizarre July Holidays

Make personalized calendars even more personal with the addition of peculiar dates; here are some for July. 

The kids and I design calendars for our family on our web site, FeeFiFoto, and in addition to the usual birthdays and anniversaries, we choose one day each month for a fictitious holiday just to see if anyone is paying attention. January 16 was Talk Like Pirates Day, February 24 was Walk Backwards Day, March 1 was Talk Really Fast Day, August 17 was Snowball Fight Day, and November 2 was Kiss Your Mom Day. We also acknowledged some legitimate holidays and anniversaries, like the Ides of March (March 15), Beethoven's Birthday (December 16) and the anniversary of Paul Revere's Ride (April 18). It was fun and silly.

Don't forget: as of today, June 30, there are 177-odd days left until Christmas.  Why not begin designing holiday calendars now?

1
Canada Day
Creative Ice Cream Flavor Day
Build A Scarecrow Day
Second Half of the Year Day

Duh

2
Visitation Of The Virgin Mary Day
I Forgot Day
Thurgood* Marshall, b. 1908

Really?  I Forgot Day?  Seriously?

3
Stay Out Of The Sun Day
Compliment Your Mirror Day
Disobedience Day
George M. Cohan, b. 1878

 

4
National Country Music Day
Tom Sawyer Fence-Painting Day
Rube Goldberg, b. 1883

You'll need that napkin to wipe the melting ice cream off your face and hands.

5
Workaholics Day
P.T. Barnum, b. 1810

6
National Fried Chicken Day
John Paul Jones, b. 1747

Fried chicken goes well with ice cream.

7
National Strawberry Sundae Day
Chocolate Day

Every day is Chocolate Day, isn't it?

8
Video Games Day

9
National Sugar Cookie Day
Nicola Tesla, b. 1856

Sugar cookies go well with ice cream.  And chocolate.

10
Clerihew Day
Don't Step on a Bee Day

11
National Cheer Up The Lonely Day
E.B. White, b. 1899

12
International Town Criers Day
National Pecan Pie Day

Pecan pie goes well with ice cream.

13
Gruntled Workers Day
Fool's Paradise Day

14
National Nude Day

 
15
Blame Respect Canada Day
National Tapioca Pudding Day
Rembrandt Van Rijn, b. 1606

16
International Juggling Day

17
National Peach Ice Cream Day
Art Linkletter*, b. 1912

18
National Ice Cream Day
National Caviar Day
Red Skelton, b. 1913

19
Flitch Day
National Raspberry Cake Day

20
Ugly Truck Contest Day
Mood Day
National Lollipop Day

21
National Tug-Of-War Tournament Day
Isaac Stern, b. 1920

22
Ratcatcher's Day
Hammock Day
Alexander Calder, b. 1898

23
National Vanilla Ice Cream Day
Hot Dog Day
Harold "Pee Wee" Reese, b. 1918

24
Amelia Earhart Day

I've always wondered who'd be brave enough to use an Amelia Earhart postage stamp.  Wouldn't you worry that your letter would be lost?

25
Threading The Needle Day

26
All Or Nothing Day
Vivian Vance, b. 1912

27
Take Your Pants For A Walk Day (graphic from the BBC)
Walk on Stilts Day

28
National Milk Chocolate Day
Beatrix Potter, b. 1866

29
Cheese Sacrifice Purchase Day
Chili Dog Day

30
National Cheesecake Day
Emily Bronte, b. 1818

Cheesecake goes well with ice cream.

31
Parent's Day

*Spellcheck offered Thursday, and Newsletter

Summer Doldrums: I'm Drowning In The Internet

Maybe I really have finally reached the end of the internet and it's time to turn off the computer and go outside.  I've lost track of how many times I've encountered the following:

Baby laughs uproariously as Sheltie runs in circles.

Unicorn Spam is the new Other White Meat.

Holding the new iPhone¹ lefthanded² causes it to drop calls.

BP spills coffee and can't figure out how to clean it up.

Kittehs play World Cup Soccer.

Hello Kitty motor oil.

Vuvuzelas³ are loud and annoying.

Bionic British cat gets faux paws.

Photos can be pretty.

Paper can be cut and folded into shapes.

Dogs can be funny.

America's Got Talent.

Britain's Got Talent.

Vuvuzelas are still loud and annoying.

Combining Coke Zero and Mentos⁴ can provide an afternoon's entertainment and require an evening's showering.

Keanu Reeves is sad.

Justin Bieber⁵ is still out there.

Lindsey Lohan is still in trouble.

Lady Gaga dresses weird and sometimes falls off her shoes.

Vampires

Werewolves

Zombies

Someone pitched a no hitter.

Vuvuzelas are a leading cause of depression, ED and childhood obesity.

What I haven't seen too much about lately:

Poison ivy

Bananas

Olivia DeHavilland⁶

Chatroulette

StumbleUpon

Snow

Christmas

____________________________________________________

Spellcheck⁷ suggested the following:

¹Siphon

²Shorthanded

³Vulvanizes, Vulgarizes

⁴Pimentos

⁵Bilberry

⁶Vaudevillian, Philanderer

⁷Spellbound 

What is the origin of this poignant self-loathing, Spellcheck?

What have you heard enough of?

Suspended For Inactivity

You know how department stores will call you if someone tries to use your credit card after it's been idle for a certain amount of time to make sure the Terminix man wasn't snooping through your desk drawers while ostensibly treating your house for weasels or carpenter ants?

You know how some gift cards expire if you don't use them before a certain date because the stores are counting on your forgetting the cards so they get to keep your money without having to surrender services or merchandise in exchange?

That reminds me -- I'd better schedule that pedicure soon...

Well, guess what?  BlogHer just sent me a plaintive note wondering where I've been and politely withdrawing my advertising until I post again.  But really, I have an excuse.  It might not be a good one but it's an excuse:

The bus was late.

No, that was yesterday.  Hold on...

The dog ate my blog.

No... no -- not that she wouldn't try, but she's actually been on good behavior lately, if you ignore the recently shredded purple Ugg*.

Bar Mitzvah. 

Yeah, that's the ticket.  This Bar Mitzvah has had me busier than a one-armed man trying to paddle a canoe in a straight line. I've been busier than a termite in a sawmill.  I've been busier than a one-armed man trying to pitch a tent in a wind storm.

Hellooo?  Anyone out there?  I know you're there -- I can hear you breathing.

And, as if the Bar Mitzvah weren't enough, I was in charge of Teacher and Staff Appreciation gifts for the month of May at Cupcake's school and I chose to give 77 people each two 750 ml bottles of Pellegrino  sparkling water, which adds up to 156 bottles in thirteen 30-pound cases of twelve; each bottle had a ribbon and a mushy note tied around its neck, which took a month to accomplish, and then I had to deliver the bottles around a school comprising six three-story buildings equipped with precisely zero elevators, which is why the next time I tackle Teacher Appreciation the gift will entail an unsharpened pencil or a handful of feathers for each teacher although why they'd want feathers I don't know but it's enough already with shlepping 390 pounds of water.

So anyway BlogHer: I'm reallyreally sorry I've been ignoring you but it's nothing personal and thanks for your kind note of suspension which I totally deserved and I promise that I'll be more reliable as soon as this Bar Mitzvah has been accomplished and the kids sent off to camp exactly a week later, and while I have your attention can you do something about getting William Shatner to host Saturday Night Live?  Thanks.

*Spell Check suggested egg or fuggy and I don't know what fuggy means but I think it might be my new favorite word.

Thought From Someone At A Loss To Produce Coherent Thoughts

• Seriously, why do TV baseball announcers feel compelled to talk 100% of the time?  The worst part, aside from the stultifying boringness of everything they say, is that they rarely describe what's actually going on.  So what are they talking about Every. Single. Minute?

• Bar Mitzvah planning is continuing apace, and now that the invitations are out I can safely reveal the Top Secret details for which I took a vow of silence nearly a year ago:

1. We're having a New Orleans-style Jazz brunch, complete with Bananas Foster and beignets*; the shrimp remoulade*, however, will be displaced by smoked salmon because eww, we're not kosher but still -- eww -- shrimp at a Bar Mitzvah?  Noooo.
   
2. The invitations to the kids' dance party were silk screened in fluorescent green paint on black tee shirts and mailed to each guest, with RSVP information on attached laminated lime green cards.  This approach presumably cuts down the amount of glowing plastic rubbish we'll have to supply to guests at the actual dance party.
3. The celebratory video is still under construction, with estimated completion date some time before June 12, 2010.

• Shouldn't the phrase "Years of Age" have been abolished after Jane Austen died?

• Speaking of Jane Austen, Cupcake and I are reading Pride and Prejudice together and I am utterly thrilled to be sharing one of my favorite books with one of my favorite readers.

• Cupcake is attending a summer school program at a boarding school in Boston for three weeks after her month at camp has ended.  She'll take classes and seminars, go on field trips, and live in the dorms like a Hogwarts student.  I might be a little bit jealous.

• Today is my father's birthday.

* Spellcheck wanted dragnets, remonstrate or remodel

Tallis? Tallit? Oh, Let's Call The Whole Thing Off

When a Jewish boy becomes a Bar Mitzvah, he usually wears a yarmulke and a tallit during the service.  A yarmulke is a skullcap worn mostly by Jewish men, although some women do choose to wear them.

The Pope wears one too, but I'm fairly certain he's not Jewish.

There's no specific law or commandment requiring Jews to cover their heads; rather, Jews who choose to wear yarmulkes wear them as a continuous reminder to respect G-d.  As Jews we're all about respecting G-d.  Respecting G-d is the basis for everything we do.  That, and food.  We Jews are also all about food.

A tallit (or tallis) is a four-cornered garment with precisely knotted fringes attached to each corner.  Jewish men (and some women) wear tallit in fulfillment of the commandment to wear fringes at the edges of garments as a reminder of the 613 mitzvot (laws or commandments) Jews are required to follow throughout each day and year.  You might ask yourself, Why are there 613 mitzvot?

Look!  A squirrel!!! 

Generally the mitzvot make a lot of sense.  There are commandments to love other Jews and not to hate them (two separate commandments; guess this concept is important), not to be superstitious (yeah, tell that to my grandma), and not to muzzle an ox while plowing. 

I have to wonder why the prohibition against murder doesn't appear until #482.  I thought this one would be important enough to show up in the Top Ten.

What?  Shut up.

In the olden days, when my mother was attending high school with Julius Caesar (thank G-d my mother doesn't read this blog), most garments consisted of large squares roughly the size and shape of bed sheets, so it wasn't difficult to attach fringes to the corners.  These days finding an appropriate way to place fringes on men's clothing is a bit more challenging, unless you had this in mind:

I love this coat.  I might even dream about this coat.

In cases where it might not be suitable to wear the knee-length indigo denim masterpiece, men can wear tallit.

So why am I bothering telling you this?

Because I made this for Robespierre:

It's his own personal tallit.  For his impending Bar Mitzvah.

This was supposed to be the back but Robey likes it as the front.  His tallit, his choice.

I knitted it.  Each row contains 300 stitches, so if you multiply that by the number of rows you come up with somewhere in the neighborhood of eleventy-billion stitches.  In fact, I enjoyed making it so much that I made it twice.  From start to finish.  Because the first time the edges came out curly and it looked girly* so I tore it apart and started allllll over.  I had a rabbi tie the fringes but I didn't want to put it on the floor with the fringes to take pictures of it, so these are the BEFORE shots.

I'm pretty proud of it, and of Robespierre.  It looks great on him and I know he'll do it justice when he reads from the Torah in June.

Soon I have to start knitting one for Cupcake.  Hers will have pink.

*Why isn't girly in my dictionary?  Spellcheck wanted girdle or Giraldo.

I've Never

• Intentionally watched Oprah or reality programming of any kind
• Read Catcher in the Rye or anything else by JD Salinger
• Broken a bone (chips, yes, but no clean breaks.  Did you know you can chip the tip of your finger if you slam it in a door?  And that, even years later, your fingertip will twinge when you type?  ow)
• Smoked anything, snorted anything, popped anything
• Seen The Godfather, Titanic, A Christmas Story, Lord of the Rings anything, or The Sixth Sense (although I know someone will shoot his eye out, someone else sees dead people, and another guy should leave the gun but take the cannoli)
• Cooked or served ham
• Read USA Today, or anything by Stephen King (not that Stephen King writes for USA Today.  Does he?  I wouldn't know, since I've never read either, see above)
• Held a loaded handgun (although I held the very old, unloaded pistol that my aunt found in my grandfather's desk after my grandfather died.  It was frozen.  We figured that he intended to throw it at burglars)
• Worn Birkenstocks* or Crocs (but Uggs keep my feet toasty oasty oasty these days)
• Seen Stonehenge in the flesh stone
• Eaten an Egg McMuffin*
• Prepared my own taxes, or anybody else's (for that matter, I'd feel great pity for anyone who had to depend on me to prepare their taxes)

What have you never?

*Spell Check wanted laughingstocks or bluestockings, crocus, scruggs, scruffiness

Wow - My Blog Is Relatively Self Sustaining

Apparently some goofballs check in here even if I have nothing to say.

Some of you might have missed me, while others are probably like "Fee who?"  I can't blame you since I've been incommunicado so long it's a wonder I remembered how to gain access to my own blog.  I promise I'll have something of substance to contribute to the information overload very soon; for now I'll just burden you with my list of excuses for not writing.

1. I thought my kids would NEVER go back to school, what with a snow day two days after winter break ended, and Robey's school's incomprehensible compulsion to give students EVERY. MONDAY. IN. JANUARY. OFF.  It's hard to write or concentrate with kids at home; if you don't believe me, you try it.  I'll send you some.
2. I've been having some work done on our house since mid-December, which has kept me busy inventing games like Endust-and-Pledge Skating to try to stay ahead of the dust.
3. Robey's Bar Mitzvah is less than six months away so my feet are getting closer to the fire.
4. I always start a new year by selling old stuff on eBay, starting this year with a vintage, mint condition Hermes silk scarf my mother gave me years ago (shhh -- don't tell her I'm selling it).
5. I've been helping Cupcake prepare for the spelling bee, studying something like 1800 words from 14 language sources (lederhosen?* gnathonic?* perestroika?)

*Spellcheck wanted leaseholder, spinsterhood, prognathous or pathogenic.  Funny -- these are (supposedly) actual dictionary words.

I'm back.  I think.

Are you back?  Are you sure?  How do you know?

Where Did You Get Those Shoes?!

Want crazy, funky shoes?  Make them yourself.

When the kid gets bored she flops from sofa to chair to floor, moaning.

I'm booooorrred.*  I hate everything.  There's nothing to do.  I've read everything. 

She hasn't. 

I don't have any friends. 

She's kidding herself. 

There's nothing on TV. 

Well, she's right about that last one.

Can I color my shoes?

The shoes arrived from Zappos in September, shiny white and scratch free.  Three months later they're still shiny white and scratch free because Cupcake doesn't like wearing sneakers so she puts them on before gym class and takes them off after gym class.

After three months of requests to Sharpie the shoes I relented for two main reasons:

1. The shoes weren't going to be with us much longer due to my kids' firm policy of accelerated clothing outgrowage, and
2. The persistent whining was threatening to give me brain damage.

An hour later she trotted into my room, where I'd fallen asleep on the floor while pretending to read a magazine been arranging my closets according to color, season, and ability to repel dog hair, and flaunted her handiwork (footiwork?):

 

Now she wears her sneakers every day.

Think they'll fit in a frame when she outgrows them?

*Spellcheck suggested boomeranged or bootstrapped.

Good grief!  Hope these pictures don't end up here.

Saving The Date, Creatively: Imaginative Save The Date Notices

Prospecting for Save the Date reminders to send to Robespierre's out of town friends six months before his Bar Mitzvah.  See Part I here.

We'd need only about a dozen or maybe 17 or, who knows, 20? save the date notices, just for guests we hope will travel to Robey's Bar Mitzvah; everyone else will already be in town.  In a rare moment of clarity I recognized that we weren't limited to a plain reminder card; I could send something more imaginative at cost from FeeFiFoto.  

First I thought I'd create personalized calendars with photos of Robey on each month and the date of his Bar Mitzvah highlighted.  But then I realized that, while calendars are a great gift for aunts, uncles, and grandparents, his friends might not be as impressed with 12 months of Robey as they would be with Sports Illustrated swimsuit models, so the calendars might just languish in desk drawers.  Plus, how many photos of a boy in a cap from his favorite baseball team can you include in a calendar before you have to resort to the Puffy Chicken costume?

 

So much for calendars.

Next I considered greeting cards, which are easy and very inexpensive to produce and mail.

Cards are nice.  We keep most of the holiday cards we receive every year so Robey and Cupcake can keep track of how their friends and relatives have changed over the years.  But a greeting card just didn't seem to be impressive enough to hold the attention of teenagers, and since we needed only about a dozen we could afford to be a little more avant garde.

Cards -- nope.

What to send?  What is it that 13 year old boys might use for years to come, that might not actually embarrass them, that might be cool enough to compel them to cross state lines in Robespierre's honor?

I considered mouse pads but Robey's friends probably have their own mouse pads and might not find it cool to use their friend's Bar Mitzvah invitation to navigate Facebook*.

A mug, perhaps?  Mugs are nice.  They're portable.  Unless they routinely slurp from the garden hose, most people use cups or mugs for their Ovaltine or YooHoo*.  And the cost wouldn't be prohibitive, since we don't have to send one to every potential guest, but only to those who are likely to have some kind of conflict coming up and need to plan far ahead.  The list couldn't possibly include more than ten people... or a dozen... or, wait a minute, we forgot to add a few friends but no more than 30... and let's not forget the German exchange student and the counselor from Scotland... 

At least it's still less than 50. So far.

Egads -- if all these boys come in, what am I going to do with them?  It's a safe bet that we won't spend the weekend watching You've Got Mail and doing manicures...

*Spell Check tried to pull off saltiness, Valentine, facetious, Yokohama, and boyhood but strangely, not Yahoo.

__________________________________________________________________

In honor of Black Friday, Cyber Monday and, what the heck, Cyber Week, through December 5 Order Personalized Photo Ornaments from FeeFiFoto before midnight on December 5 and receive 20% off. Apply coupon code ORNAMENTS09 at checkout.

Offer Expires: December 5, 2009

Remembering Not To Forget: Sending Save The Date Reminders

Ever have two, or three, or infinite opportunities that all arise on the same day?  How do you choose?

Robespierre has blindsided me in the midst of Bar Mitzvah preparation, which diverges from planning a war mainly in degree of spontaneity; planning B'nai Mitzvot (plural of Bar Mitzvah.  You just learned something) must be conducted many months in advance, and requires you to predict weather conditions, which of your child's friends will still be his friends six months from now, your weight, and who might be maneuvering selfishly for a share of your guest list by thoughtlessly planning competing B'nai* Mitzvot on the same weekend.

Through all stages of planning so far, we haven't encountered many conflicts.  One friend is planning a Bar Mitzvah the same day but the guest lists don't overlap too much, except that Click, my sister's husband, seems to think he'll be able to attend both so the other family has offered not to invite him but I suspect he'll try to show up anyway and knowing him, he'll pull it off.  Robey's Bar Mitzvah comes just after the end of the school year so we won't have to work around school nights or homework or exams.  The weather in early June should be pleasant and reliable unless we run into a particularly aggressive tornado season, in which case we'll probably have more important things to worry about than lox and gefilte fish (don't ask -- you wouldn't like it).  We don't have a lot of out of town friends or relatives (Hi Linda!) so I've been planning an extended weekend without devoting much thought to coordinating varied travel schedules.

But.

There's always a BUT, isn't there?

Unbeknownst to me, Robespierre's been cultivating a kudzu-like list of camp friends from out of town who absolutely MUST be invited and will most likely end up staying with us when the weekend rolls around.  To further complicate matters, Robey's Bar Mitzvah date falls less than a week before the start of camp, when parents are finalizing arrangements for a two month stay at a Mediterranean resort packing trunks and duffel bags, fitting in last minute haircuts and orthodontist visits, and self-addressing stationery that will come back two months later crushed but otherwise unsullied. 

Here's the equation in case you've lost your bearings, and I don't blame you because I'm rapidly losing mine and I have all most some of this stuff neatly organized in a binder:

2 3 7 13 17 Out Of Town Camp Friends

notice clever use of prime numbers for no reason except my impulse to prove I know them

+

Event Occurring Between End Of School And Start Of Camp

=

Ruh Roh.  Will ANYONE Attend Robespierre's Bar Mitzvah?

Save The Date notices.  We'll need them. 

Thanks for the tip, Liz.

Save the date.  Hmmm.  Save. The. Date.  What to send that would be smart, memorable and keepable? because I'm all about mementos.

Tell you tomorrow.

Spell Check offered Banzai or hobnail.

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In honor of Black Friday, Cyber Monday and, what the heck, Cyber Week, through December 5 Order Personalized Photo Ornaments from FeeFiFoto before midnight on December 5 and receive 20% off. Apply coupon code ORNAMENTS09 at checkout.

Offer Expires: December 5, 2009

Is This New Or Have I Been Dozing Off Again?

Navigating BlogHer has just gotten easier.

A few weeks ago I emailed BlogHer to ask for an easy way to locate other BlogHer bloggers, since my scattered brain can't seem to cope with a Chinese-menu-sized list of blogs and whenever I explore I end up choosing sites with cool names that haven't been updated since April because apparently they used up all their creativity on cool names and have nothing left to devote to actual writing and then I get frustrated and disgusted and give up and go back to reading Daisy, Bossy, Cupcake and The Blogess. 

Their response was quick and clear: click to the BlogHer advertising page and select from the list of blogs in the column on the left.  So I tried it and found some impressive sites and I was all Lalalalala* and then I noticed... The Search Widget.

I didn't want to startle it by making any sudden moves so I tiptoed carefully and quietly around it and then I uploaded it here and gadzooks! not only does it provide short and constantly rotating lists of BlogHer bloggers, but one day last week it even featured mine!  That means it works!  And it found me!  And I'm popular!  Or something!

Do you have a pet widget?  Why or why not?

*Spellcheck suggested Balalaika, Lallygagged and Phenylalanine as alternatives for this word.  Really, Spellcheck?  Seriously?

__________________________________________________________________

In honor of Black Friday, Cyber Monday and, what the heck, Cyber Week, through December 5 Order Personalized Photo Ornaments from FeeFiFoto before midnight on December 5 and receive 20% off. Apply coupon code ORNAMENTS09 at checkout.

Offer Expires: December 5, 2009